Two and a Half Men

2003 Serija 0 Comedy

Charlie is a well-to-do bachelor with a house at the beach, a Jaguar in the front, and an easy way with women. His casual Malibu lifestyle is interrupted when his tightly wound brother Alan, who's facing a divorce, and his son Jake, come to live with him. Together, these two and a half men confront the challenges of growing up; finally. Complicating matters are the brothers' self-obsessed, controlling mother, Evelyn, Alan's estranged wife, Judith and Charlie's crazy neighbor Rose, who wants to be a part of his life and is willing to do anything to be around. After the death of his brother, Alan Harper meets and befriends a lonely young man named Walden Schmidt who turns out to be a billionaire. Unable to afford his brother's home, Alan sells Walden the house, and as a way of showing his gratitude, Walden allows Alan and his son Jake to move in with him.

SEZONE I EPIZODE

Sezona 1 24 Epizoda

E1 Pilot

E2 Big Flappy Bastards

E3 Go East on Sunset Until You Reach the Gates of Hell

E4 If I Can't Write My Chocolate Song I'm Going to Take a Nap

E5 The Last Thing You Want Is to Wind Up with a Hump

E6 Did You Check with the Captain of the Flying Monkeys?

E7 If They Do Go Either Way, They're Usually Fake

E8 Twenty-Five Little Pre-pubers Without a Snoot-ful

E9 Phase One, Complete

E10 Merry Thanksgiving

E11 Alan Harper, Frontier Chiropractor

E12 Camel Filters + Pheromones

E13 Sarah Like Puny Alan

E14 I Can't Afford Hyenas

E15 Round One to the Hot Crazy Chick (1)

E16 That Was Saliva, Alan (2)

E17 Ate the Hamburgers, Wearing the Hats

E18 An Old Flame with a New Wick

E19 I Remember the Coatroom, I Just Don't Remember You

E20 Hey, I Can Pee Outside in the Dark

E21 No Sniffing, No Wowing

E22 My Doctor Has a Cow Puppet

E23 Just Like Buffalo

E24 Can You Feel My Finger?

Sezona 2 24 Epizoda

E1 Back Off, Mary Poppins

E2 Enjoy Those Garlic Balls

E3 A Bag Full of Jawea

E4 Go Get Mommy's Bra

E5 Bad News from the Clinic?

E6 The Price of Healthy Gums Is Eternal Vigilance

E7 A Kosher Slaughterhouse Out in Fontana

E8 Frankenstein and the Horny Villagers

E9 Yes, Monsignor

E10 The Salmon Under My Sweater

E11 Last Chance to See Those Tattoos

E12 A Lung Full of Alan

E13 Zejdz Zmoich Wlosow

E14 Those Big Pink Things with Coconuts

E15 Smell the Umbrella Stand

E16 Can You Eat Human Flesh with Wooden Teeth?

E17 Woo-Hoo, a Hernia Exam!

E18 It was 'Mame,' Mom

E19 A Low, Guttural Tongue-Flapping Noise

E20 I Always Wanted a Shaved Monkey

E21 A Sympathetic Crotch to Cry On

E22 That Old Hose Bag Is My Mother

E23 Squab, Squab, Squab, Squab, Squab

E24 Does This Smell Funny to You?

Sezona 3 24 Epizoda

E1 Weekend in Bangkok with Two Olympic Gymnasts

E2 Principal Gallagher's Lesbian Lover

E3 Carpet Burns and a Bite Mark

E4 Your Dismissive Attitude Toward Boobs

E5 We Called It Mr. Pinky

E6 Hi, Mr. Horned One

E7 Sleep Tight, Puddin' Pop

E8 That Voodoo That I Do Do

E9 Madame and Her Special Friend

E10 Something Salted and Twisted

E11 Santa's Village of the Damned

E12 That Special Tug

E13 Humiliation Is a Visual Medium

E14 Love Isn't Blind, It's Retarded

E15 My Tongue Is Meat

E16 Ergo, the Booty Call

E17 The Unfortunate Little Schnauser

E18 The Spit-Covered Cobbler

E19 Golly Moses, She's a Muffin

E20 Always a Bridesmaid, Never a Burro

E21 And the Plot Moistens

E22 Just Once with Aunt Sophie

E23 Arguments for the Quickie

E24 That Pistol-Packin' Hermaphrodite

Sezona 4 24 Epizoda

E1 Working for Caligula

E2 Who's Vod Kanockers?

E3 The Sea Is a Harsh Mistress

E4 A Pot Smoking Monkey

E5 A Live Woman of Proven Fertility

E6 Apologies for the Frivolity

E7 Repeated Blows to His Unformed Head

E8 Release the Dogs

E9 Corey's Been Dead for an Hour

E10 Kissing Abraham Lincoln

E11 Walnuts and Demerol

E12 Castrating Sheep in Montana

E13 Don't Worry, Speed Racer

E14 That's Summer Sausage, Not Salami

E15 My Damn Stalker

E16 Young People Have Phlegm Too

E17 I Merely Slept with a Commie

E18 It Never Rains in Hooterville

E19 Smooth As a Ken Doll

E20 Aunt Myra Doesn't Pee a Lot

E21 Tucked, Taped and Gorgeous

E22 Mr. McGlue's Feedbag

E23 Anteaters. They're Just Crazy-lookin

E24 Prostitutes and Gelato

Sezona 5 19 Epizoda

E1 Large Birds, Spiders and Mom

E2 Media Room Slash Dungeon

E3 Dum Diddy Dum Diddy Doo

E4 City of Great Racks

E5 Putting Swim Fins on a Cat

E6 Help Daddy Find His Toenail

E7 Our Leather Gear Is in the Guest Room

E8 Is There a Mrs. Waffles?

E9 Tight's Good

E10 Kinda Like Necrophilia

E11 Meander to Your Dander

E12 A Little Clammy and None Too Fresh

E13 The Soil Is Moist

E14 Winky-Dink Time

E15 Rough Night in Hump Junction

E16 Look at Me, Mommy, I'm Pretty

E17 Fish in a Drawer

E18 If My Hole Could Talk

E19 Waiting for the Right Snapper

Sezona 6 24 Epizoda

E1 Taterhead Is Our Love Child

E2 Pie Hole, Herb

E3 Damn You, Eggs Benedict

E4 The Flavin' and the Mavin'

E5 A Jock Strap in Hell

E6 It's Always Nazi Week

E7 Best H.O. Money Can Buy

E8 Pinocchio's Mouth

E9 The Mooch at the Boo

E10 He Smelled the Ham, He Got Excited

E11 The Devil's Lube

E12 Thank God for Scoliosis

E13 I Think You Offended Don

E14 David Copperfield Slipped Me a Roofie

E15 I'd Like to Start with the Cat

E16 She'll Still Be Dead at Halftime

E17 The 'Ocu' or the 'Pado'?

E18 My Son's Enormous Head

E19 The Two Finger Rule

E20 Hello, I Am Alan Cousteau

E21 Above Exalted Cyclops

E22 Sir Lancelot's Litter Box

E23 Good Morning, Mrs. Butterworth

E24 Baseball with Better Steroids

Sezona 7 22 Epizoda

E1 818-jklpuzo

E2 Whipped Unto the Third Generation

E3 Mmm, Fish. Yum.

E4 Laxative Tester, Horse Inseminator

E5 For the Sake of the Child

E6 Give Me Your Thumb

E7 Untainted by Filth

E8 Gorp. Fnark. Schmegle.

E9 Captain Terry's Spray-On Hair

E10 That's Why They Call It Ball Room

E11 Warning, It's Dirty

E12 Fart Jokes, Pie and Celeste

E13 Yay, No Polyps!

E14 Crude and Uncalled For

E15 Aye, Aye, Captain

E16 Tinkle Like a Princess

E17 I Found Your Moustache

E18 Ixnay on the Oggie Day

E19 Keith Moon Is Vomiting in His Grave

E20 I Called Him Magoo

E21 Gumby with a Pokey

E22 This Is Not Gonna End Well

Sezona 8 16 Epizoda

E1 Three Girls and a Guy Named Bud

E2 A Bottle of Wine and a Jackhammer

E3 A Pudding-Filled Cactus

E4 Hookers, Hookers, Hookers

E5 The Immortal Mr. Billy Joel

E6 Twanging Your Magic Clanger

E7 The Crazy Bitch Gazette

E8 Springtime on a Stick

E9 A Good Time in Central Africa

E10 Ow, Ow, Don't Stop

E11 Dead from the Waist Down

E12 Chocolate Diddlers or My Puppy's Dead

E13 Skunk, Dog, Crap and Ketchup

E14 Lookin' for Japanese Subs

E15 Three Hookers and a Philly Cheesesteak

E16 That Darn Priest

Sezona 9 24 Epizoda

E1 Nice to Meet You, Walden Schmidt

E2 People Who Love Peepholes

E3 Big Girls Don't Throw Food

E4 Nine Magic Fingers

E5 A Giant Cat Holding a Churro

E6 The Squat and the Hover

E7 Those Fancy Japanese Toilets

E8 Thank You for the Intercourse

E9 Frodo's Headshots

E10 A Fishbowl Full of Glass Eyes

E11 What a Lovely Landing Strip

E12 One False Move, Zimbabwe!

E13 Slowly and in a Circular Fashion

E14 A Possum on Chemo

E15 The Duchess of Dull-in-Sack

E16 Sips, Sonnets and Sodomy

E17 Not in My Mouth!

E18 The War Against Gingivitis

E19 Palmdale, Ech

E20 Grandma's Pie

E21 Mr. Hose Says 'Yes'

E22 Why We Gave Up Women

E23 The Straw in My Donut Hole

E24 Oh Look! Al-Qaeda!

Sezona 10 23 Epizoda

E1 I Changed My Mind About the Milk

E2 A Big Bag of Dog

E3 Four Balls, Two Bats and One Mitt

E4 You Do Know What the Lollipop's For

E5 That's Not What They Call It in Amsterdam

E6 Ferrets, Attack!

E7 Avoid the Chinese Mustard

E8 Something My Gynecologist Said

E9 I Scream When I Pee

E10 One Nut Johnson

E11 Give Santa a Tail-Hole

E12 Welcome to Alancrest

E13 Grab a Feather and Get in Line

E14 Run, Steven Staven! Run!

E15 Paint It, Pierce It or Plug It

E16 Advantage: Fat, Flying Baby

E17 Throgwarten Middle School Mysteries

E18 The 9:04 from Pemberton

E19 Big Episode. Someone Stole a Spoon

E20 Bazinga! That's from a TV Show

E21 Another Night with Neil Diamond

E22 My Bodacious Vidalia

E23 Cows, Prepare to Be Tipped

Sezona 11 22 Epizoda

E1 Nangnangnangnang

E2 I Think I Banged Lucille Ball

E3 This Unblessed Biscuit

E4 Clank, Clank, Drunken Skank

E5 Alan Harper, Pleasing Women Since 2003

E6 Justice in Star-Spangled Hot Pants

E7 Some Kind of Lesbian Zombie

E8 Mr. Walden, He Die. I Clean Room.

E9 Numero Uno Accidente Lawyer

E10 On Vodka, on Soda, on Blender, on Mixer!

E11 Tazed in the Lady Nuts

E12 Baseball. Boobs. Boobs. Baseball.

E13 Bite Me, Supreme Court

E14 Three Fingers of Crème de Menthe

E15 Cab Fare and a Bottle of Penicillin

E16 How to Get Rid of Alan Harper

E17 Welcome Home, Jake

E18 West Side Story

E19 Lan Mao Shi Zai Wuding Shang

E20 Lotta Delis in Little Armenia

E21 Dial 1-900-Mix-a-Lot

E22 Oh WALD-E, Good Times Ahead

Sezona 12 16 Epizoda

E1 The Ol' Mexican Spinach

E2 A Chic Bar in Ibiza

E3 Glamping in a Yurt

E4 Thirty-Eight, Sixty-Two, Thirty-Eight

E5 Oontz. Oontz. Oontz.

E6 Alan Shot a Little Girl

E7 Sex with an Animated Ed Asner

E8 Family, Bublé, Deep-fried Turkey

E9 Bouncy, Bouncy, Bouncy, Lyndsey

E10 Here I Come, Pants!

E11 For Whom the Booty Calls

E12 A Beer-Battered Rip-Off

E13 Boompa Loved His Hookers

E14 Don't Give a Monkey a Gun

E15 Of Course He's Dead - Part One

E16 Of Course He's Dead - Part Two